This phrase has been on my mind all week. Ideas have been dancing around in my head, formulating themselves in to a blog post, finally.
The first few months of this year were not fun. I worked A LOT. I was miserable.
Then, sometime in March, everything became eerily more quiet. Things slowed down just enough at work so I could breathe.
I took weekends off, multiple weekends in a row. It felt very strange (but good!)
I went shopping and bought myself some new clothes and started venturing out of the house again. I found a yoga studio near my house that I really like and I started going to yoga once a week. Yay! I put my running shoes back on and hit the East River running path once a week.
I spent a week with my sister and her adorable family (including a sweet new baby girl) and relaxed and enjoyed my time with them and, almost completely, ignored work.
I found my way back to meditation. I read 10% Happier about this ABC newscaster who found HIS way to meditation (through a lot of crazy people and then finally some people who made sense) and it reminded me of what meditation CAN do and why I should keep trying.
I have been meeting with my coach. My resume is updated and we hit on some good points about some of the things holding me back from looking for something new and being open to explore before rejecting things. She also put me on a quest to get 500 linked in connections which has connected me with many long lost old friends and colleagues. I started having conversations with people to try to figure out what I might want to do with the second half of my life.
I am writing to guys on OK Cupid and got myself on Hinge the newest dating app that connects you with friends of your friends (and their friends) on Facebook. Nothing has led to an actual date, but I am collecting more funny stories to tell (perhaps in a future post.)
I just keep moving towards something better, one small step at a time. Earlier this week I felt a shift. A small shift, like two tectonic plates settling micro inches in to a new position.
Everything on that list was a bit of a struggle. I was pretty miserable and tired and part of me wanted to sit on the couch and eat bean dip and drink wine every day, but I didn’t (not every day). Each thing on its own doesn’t seem like much, but when I look at it all together, I am creating new possibilities. My world is just a little bit bigger. And that makes me, some % happier. I am not prepared to commit to a % (I am still a cautious, perfectionist. It was just a tiny shift.) but definitely happier than I was two months ago.
My sister told me that I work harder at being a better person than anyone she knows. I was quite proud to have that honor. The better person I am the more I can give back to the world and that is my entire reason for being.
OK, things got a little heavy there. Maybe I am on my way to enlightenment? Is that possible after only 5 days back on the meditation? Must be the endorphins from the run I just went on.